The point is to help — Kelford Labs Daily

Last week, a friend of mine said they were heading into a conversation with a prospect, which could turn into a large project.

“So I really want to impress them,” my friend said.

And isn’t that the natural instinct? When we want to impress, we try to impress. We want to overdo it, and show off what makes us so smart, so skilled, so perfect for the project.

But as I told my friend, that usually backfires. We can end up looking desperate, over-eager, and too self-interested.

So if we want to impress, we can’t try to impress.

Instead, we’ve got to help.

Because the way to actually impress a prospect is to help them in a way no one else does, or can.

That’s not loading them down with advice in the first meeting, or pointing out all the ways they can improve.

No, it’s about having a conversation with them, asking questions that reveal their challenges while highlighting your experience.

Demonstrating your position, your process.

But this isn’t just about conversations. It applies to all of our marketing, all of our attempts at demonstrating our value. When we make it all about us and all about what the prospect is doing wrong, we don’t actually help.

We can even trigger what Tali Sharot calls the “No Go Response” in The Influential Mind:

“When we are faced with the possibility of acquiring something good, our brains trigger a chain of biological events that makes us more likely to act fast. This is known as the brains ‘Go’ response.

In contrast, when we are anticipating something bad, our instinct is to withdraw. The brain triggers a ‘No Go’ reaction.”

If our marketing does its job right, it does more than demonstrate value, it delivers it. It motivates it.

It leaves our prospects with more than they came with, more eager to move ahead than they started.

Because it gives them a sample of how we help, a taste of what working with us could be like. It gives them something to look forward to more of.

So if you want to impress, you can. By not trying to.

And by trying to help instead.

(Oh, my friend got the project, by the way.)

Reply to this email to tell me what you think, or ask any questions!

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